Friday, April 15, 2011


I'm still so sad. Every few hours I just dissolve into these deep crying jags that last for like fifteen minutes. I finally got to sleep early this morning by lying to myself and pretending that Rusty was laying in his dog bed next to my side of the bed.

I miss that damn dog so much.

But I'm thankful he was a part of our family. I'm glad he was here even though his being gone feels like a hundred empty holes in my chest.

I'm grateful for a lot of things. I'm thankful for my husband and kids. The house over our heads. Never having to worry about food or clothes, heat or clean water.

I'm thankful (so, so thankful) that we are all healthy. That we are employed. My kids go to a good school and have kind friends.

I'm grateful for our neighbors (who I actually know!)

I have the opportunity to pursue something I enjoy doing that brings an enormous amount of creative satisfaction (writing.) And I'm thankful for all the wonderful people I've met online that share this same crazy dream (publication) who know what it's like to ride the roller coaster (the steep climbs and sharp belly lurching drops...the seemingly endless waiting in line.)

Mostly, I guess I'm thankful for not being alone--in every area of my life. 


  1. I'm so sorry to hear about your dog. I finally saw the post. Very sad. HOpefully it will get easier with time.

  2. *hugs* They sure can work their way into our hearts, can't they?

  3. They really do become family members.